Tag Archive | Help and Advice

Do You Want A Relationship?

Because if you do – you had better speak up.

In the three years since my wedding, all phone calls between us have been made by me.

I tried to be sensitive to you.  I tried to have a relationship with you.

But somehow, in the three-plus years since Yitzchak’s and my wedding, you have not “forgiven” us for getting married, and you have tried to avoid me.  Or at least, that’s how it feels to me.

And I have to find out news through a third party.

Not that your mother is any better.  I called her up to wish her a happy holiday, and she tried to end the conversation as fast as possible.  And when Yitzchak called her up, she didn’t even remember his name – he had to introduce himself as my husband.

I am really mad, and really hurt.

And I think I don’t want to put any more energy into a relationship with you.  I just don’t have infinite energy that I can throw away.  Plus, I don’t like worrying about you and trying to be sensitive, and then getting a slap in the face for it.

So, if I don’t want to celebrate with you, and I don’t want to talk to you, don’t be surprised.

Yitzchak thinks I should call and yell at you.  I think that it’s not worth it.  And that you don’t deserve to be yelled at.  Because yelling takes energy; yelling means that I care about you and about our relationship.

Since I have seen that you don’t care about me, and you don’t care about our relationship, I am letting go.

I hope you have a nice life.

Just don’t blame me for ending our relationship.

But you will, and I know it.  Just like you have been blaming me for three years.

So fine, continue.  Please don’t expect me to share things with you, though, because I don’t think I will.*











*Hey, sis – if you read this, it is NOT meant for you.  You HAVE called me in the three years since my wedding, right?  So, I’m not talking about you.  I’m talking about someone who I have to call, and who when I see her, I have to start talking to, because she won’t.  And, my conversations with her are always stilted.  But you, you and I had a great conversation tonight, right?  So, there’s the proof – I’m not talking about you.