This post was written on April 24, 2015. I didn’t publish it then, because it needed a few tweaks. Later, I didn’t publish it because life got hectic, and Antarctica was the furthest thing from my mind – besides for the fact that I was glad, at that point, that we live in a regular, civilized country.
Probably, you have already read about my Antarctica joke. It goes like this:
Oh, no, X/Y/Z happened. This world is such an awful, scary place. I don’t know why I want to live in it, and I seriously don’t know why I am bringing another kid/ want to bring more kids into it. Ugh. It’s not safe in Israel, but at least here it’s more safe than other places, and we have a government and an army that doesn’t stick their heads into the sand. If I thought there was a safer place, I’d go, but I don’t think any country is safe now . . . there’s really nowhere you can live safely . . .
Hey, wait! We can move to Antarctica!
Except that Yitzchak always pops the bubble:
Antarctica will suffer the after-effects of nukes in other places, just like every other country will, he says.
In twenty years, Antarctica will be the center of a major war, as every country tries to stake its claim, when the weather warms up and the land becomes habitable (there’s a treaty until 2048, maybe it will be extended?).
We would have sun six months out of the year, and we would have to accept Shabbat at one in the afternoon sometimes. On the other hand, Shabbat would end at one in the afternoon – nice, but it makes the day pretty rushed, with barely enough time to daven and do kiddush.
Hmmm, there’s no mikva, and the snow doesn’t sound too nice.
At one point, he tried to scare me by telling me that it wasn’t exactly a safe place for women, because half the researchers are single guys who haven’t seen a woman in years. Turns out, there are families there, too.
Our heating bill will be outrageous . . .
And so on . . .
But as we come closer to understanding that Iran will be allowed to get nukes, as far as Obama is concerned, and Putin has no issues giving Iran the tools to help them defend their nuclear reactor – and North Korea continues to help them develop nuclear weapons;
and as I hear more and more often about kidnappings, shootings, and who knows what;
and as we start and stop, start and stop, the task of getting rid of Hamas;
I’ve started to think that it’s better just to pick up and move.
Now all I have to do is convince Yitzchak.